Like that legend people call Van Gogh I do not think life can be "Infinitely Vacant". But that's just me. I like to disagree with legends. But that's besides the point here. These are not the best of times. These are also not the worst of times. These are the times when the lapses of past sadness crawl into the skin and stay there. There is something so fulfilling about pain. A kind of fulfillment that joy could never provide. I know what you are thinking. Pessimism at its best. But it is not. But then you might argue that it is not exactly optimism either. And you are right. But then why does it have to be anything at all? Why do we crave labels? Why do most of us walk around with an authority to diagnose everyone else around us?
We are where we wanted to be in life. You may also call them choices. Destiny some might say? Well I don't know about that. We are here because we believed it was worth taking the risk. So we went through hell in getting ourselves here but somehow we made it to the mountain top or perhaps rock bottom. But we made it here nonetheless. Depending on the circumstances I would say go ahead and hate this life you have created for yourself. You can love it too if you want. Or it can be somewhere in between. But as long as you are not indifferent I do think that you will be okay. Indifference to me is like slow death. Indifference is like an Hyper Acute Infarction. It is not reversible. The damage is permanent.
And you know what else? That feeling of alienation is killing you inside. But that is okay. You will get through it. Look at the flip side of it. You can only feel alienated and secluded because you've belonged somewhere. You are lucky because you've called a place out there "home". Because there are plenty of us who have never belonged anywhere simply because we have never called a place "home". And no it has nothing to do with not being privileged. Its has nothing to do with our status in the society. Some of us are just simply unfortunate. And no we are not invisible. Just our pain is.
Then people might ask you about how many times life has kicked you in the gut? And you might not be able to come up with a number. And that is also okay. But the ways to deal with that pain probably out numbers the times you have been hurt. Because I know a thing or two about life as well. It can not be that harsh to anyone. Then you might tell me that you were on top of that beautiful glass tower when life came crashing at you and suddenly you were hitting rock bottom. You were living all the cliches as in the bathroom floor and what not.
And to be really honest it will never go away. The pain. And that laughter sidelined by more pain. Also why should it all dissolve into nothingness? Its only fair that it stays and creeps up on you from time to time. You signed up for this life? So deal with the down side of things as well and it can not be that bad because I will tell you as to why. Today a child lost his mother. Today those parents buried their first born. Today they found another girl on the streets after she was raped. Today a father found out that his daughter will never wake up from that coma and today was the day you witnessed it all but you know what else? Today was also the day when none of that happened with you. It happened around you but did not happen to you.
Today was also the day when a plane did not crash into a tall building. It was the day when no drone attacks were reported. Today no earthquakes torn a town apart.
Today also happens to be the day when he waits for you on the other side. You just have to meet him there and never let go of that hand. A hand he offered to you when life was way too unkind. So dear life I love you only because it is only fair. It is because you have loved me as well. Without any limitations.
I thank you for everything that you've given me and the things you've taken away so far. Thank you because today indeed has been okay.